Aaaaaaand, I'm done! Finally done with this month long journey!
I wanna thank everyone who helped me get this point, my mom, my spotify, and my dog of course. I feel I've come very far during this process and can't wait to see where I go next. Thank you so much, and I hope you enjoy Retrospect.
Here's the link to the google drive containing the finished product:
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1jgFZJP6dA0Ee0Whk2NIhI9aE46ePnAzT?usp=sharing
After acquiring all the necessary sound aspects that I needed I was able to slap it all into premiere and mess around a bit. This was my first time experimenting with audio in such a way and I had fun, I even had to use volume dial, which I didn't even know existed in premiere until right now. But anyway, everything came together, it was tedious trying to get everything to sync but we did it! I think I can safely say I'm done editing now.
I got all my titles and credits in order. I did have to move around my footage a lot again and cut out some portions. But that's just editing at the end of the day, a lot of back and forth. You think you're done but usually you're not, and when you fix something another thing gets messed up yada yada yada. Shoutout to premiere tho, I love that program, it has done me nothing but good in all the years I've used it. Also shoutout to my 7th grade film teacher for showing me how to use premiere.
Now enjoy looking at the monster that is the timeline of my project on premiere:
Alright so regarding all the sound editing that I planned to do. I found all of it on youtube. This was my first time using the Youtube Sound Library and it was pretty good, very easy to use and it got the job done. The thrifted youth mp3 was the only one i didn't get from there, I just had to download it from youtube as an mp3 to add to my project. Down below are the three audio files I incorporated in my project.
Although I had already recorded the ambiance of my house for the film opening, but I thought it necessary to add a little more to it, so I found that Ambient hum from an air conditioner sound and though it was perfect. Then the ear ringing was that tinnitus, panic inducing, sound that I was looking to add in at the end when Arlo gets stressed out by memories of the past. Oooooooooouuooo!
These are the audio files, don't mind the 'Out of Space,' it hasn't meant anything so far...:
PHEW! I'm pretty much done with the brunt of editing. I have such a love hate relationship with editing. My hatred grows as I find myself in front of a computer for several hours, but the final product makes it all worth it. I have finished organizing all my footage and cutting it up to fit within the 2 minute time frame.
All that's left now is refining everything a little more if necessary, adding sound, and adding credits. It's exciting to finally see everything coming together at last. This has been a doozy of a project. Seeing all the cut up clips is pretty funny, it always looks so messy to me, but well that's art for ya.
I'm finally done filming. There were a few bumps along the road, definitely had to reshoot an embarrassing amount of times but we got there eventually. All of the filming was done by yours truly, so there was definitely a lot of awkward positions I had to be in while the camera was rolling. If anyone walked in on me I must've looked crazy, thankfully no one did. Dodged a bullet there with that one...
Anyway, I am NOT looking forward to having to watch my atrocious acting on repeat while I edit this opening. It sucks yes, but I couldn't find anyone willing to help me, and I wasn't going to force them. I also just feel more comfortable with it being me on the basis that I know what I want. Sometimes I struggle to give directions or effectively convey my creative vision with another person, so then it doesn't turn out how I want it and I'm too shy to ask them to do it again usually because I think I'm bothering them. I definitely have to work on that if I want to be a director in the future... crap...
Here's a funny clip of me realizing the camera is in the wrong place:
Alright, so we've hit a roadblock. I have, for many different reasons, realized that it will not be possible to use the picture frame/ Arlo watching old video idea I originally started with. The older video not being footage created by me, being unable to find a picture frame that fit my creative vision, etc. So, yeah... it's kind of a big deal, but we're going to adapt and recover.
My new plan is the best alternative I could find. I have a mug in my house, really ugly, but in a good way. I made it when I was younger, so it could work as the perfect 'memento' hehe. Here's what I'm thinking: a young Arlo filming themselves, showing off the mug they painted. I plan to use editing and costuming/ mise-en-scene to try and make myself look younger and the footage look slightly older. I don't want to go overboard with the editing obviously, I'm not gonna make it look retro, I wasn't even alive in the 90's.
A picture of the mug:
Modified storyboard:
Now there will actually be voice lines in my opening. Only in this section however, so there's not a lot. I feel like I can't really call it a script when it's 3 lines but here.
Arlo: Ok, we're recording!
Arlo sets phone down to talk to camera.
Arlo: Hi! I would tell you my name but mom told me not to say it on the internet. But anyway, look what I made!
Arlo holds out a poorly painted mug.
Arlo: Isn't it cool! It looked sad and boring in the cupboard, sooooooo I decided I would make it pretty and fun. This is now my favorite mug in the house. I declare thee, Sir Muggy! Oh! I should go show mom! Ok bye!
I have some cool sound ideas that I really think would bring my project to the next level.
The past student portfolio project example that I spoke briefly of in another blog post did something super sick that I want to replicate in my own way. During their project, they showed that the music being played for the audience was actually diegetic through a record player (good stuff). I thought I could do something similar but with Arlo's headphones. So, during the initial credits I'll play a song, probably royalty free, and then, when the first scene starts, Arlo can take off their headphones. This action will cause the music to stop, obviously alluding to the music having been playing on Arlo's headphones all along, the audience listening along with them.
Most of my project will just be ambient noise since there is no dialogue and Arlo is in a desolate house. However, to add a little spice, I thought it would be absolutely sick to add a ringing sound, kinda like tinnitus (which I have hehe), during the more intense, nervous breakdown scene toward the end of the opening. So I'll have to figure out how to edit that into the sound later on. I'm worrying about visuals right now, sound is most likely going to be next week's problem.
I recently started throwing all my clips into adobe and just playing around with them. After restarting entirely, accidentally deleting footage, and running out of space on my computer and phone many times, I think I finally pulled something together. Geez, I love editing, but it just takes me so loooong, maybe I'm just incompetent. I've only gotten the visual part of the initial credits, no sound or actual text yet, and it took me like 5 hours. O_O I try my best though, and it's very rewarding seeing everything come together. The following is the work I've gotten done so far:
Now, I know, I've realized that I've been putting this off. Weather subconsciously or not, I have definitely been avoiding coming up with a darn title for this project. But can you blame me? This stuff is hard. I feel like the title is such a pivotal part of the opening since it has to fit well with the tone, the mood, the VIBE of the film opening. I've always hated making titles for anything, it's like a phobia. On my poems, drawings, essays, film projects... relationships... ANYWAY, I've been brainstorming some ideas for possible titles and I think I'm close.
1. Memento - It fits with the whole theme of looking back and hating happy old memories because one feels miserable in comparison. "Memento" works since there is a physical object that reminds Arlo of when they were happy.
2. Vain/ Futile - This one leans more toward the depressing aspect of the film opening, conveying how Arlo feels that life has no meaning anymore and how it's all useless. Arlo feels that their life has amounted to nothing.
3. Looking Back/ Nostalgia/ Retrospect - Kind of piggybacking off the memento idea but a little more simple. Also apparently Christopher Nolan already made a movie called memento... he's lucky he's one of my favorite directors because OH MY-! So these are just some alternatives that I think could still fit pretty well. I do have to admit however, Nostalgia is really cringe.
Oh, I almost forgot to post this before, but another aspect I put generous amounts of though into was Arlo's outfit. What would they be wearing throughout the opening. I though long and hard about this and came up with many ideas. I though of a red hoodie and a blue shirt to convey both saddness and anger, but though it would look too unnatural and cartoonish. I though about just going with an all black outfit, but that felt to simple, and Arlo would just fade into the background that way, they needed to stick out somehow.
I wanted something realistic and simple, but would still help to express how Arlo feels and make them the focal point of the opening, which they are. So I settled on black joggers, a black shirt with some red in it, and a red zip-up hoodie. I thought the black and baggy outfit could represent Arlos depression as well as fitting well and realistically with a non-bianary characters clothing. The red zip-up then representing the anger and disdain they feel, wearing it as a protective shell of sorts.
OK, I got a rough draft per say together of what the set will look like for inicial filming tomorrow. There is still defenitely more I can and probably will add to it as well as some tweaks here and there. However, I just really needed to see something to try and invision how this will actually go. There are also already some deveations and changes I made from my original plan, some were voluntary and other weren't.
Firstly, during actual filming, this all will be a lot darker, I want to keep the lighting to a mínimum to add to the depressing tone of my opening. Some light will be coming from the computer, some from an outside source, and I'm still debating adding a lama in there. Also, the papers, I decided that the set needed something more, and I though papers were the perfect addition that could give it that sense of frantic disorder that reflecta Arlo's mental state.
As I mentioned before, I've actually been thinking and coming up with ideas for this project since second quarter. So there's been a lot of thought put into this, and surprisingly, my concept has not changed that much. I began with an emotionally caged and frustrated character, in their room, and it's evident that they are losing it. Here's a picture of my pas plan (very well drawn out might I add):
My original plan however had a scene of my character writing "WHERE DREAMS COME TO DIE" really big on the walls of their room, trying to express how they feel in some way, and then walking out of the room, of screen, ending the opening. I asked my mother if I could write on my bedroom door, and she promptly responded no, which is fair. So, I had to come up with something else. This is how I came to the hallway/photograph/memories idea. I though it'd be good to have a nice change of scenery after the credits to establish that distinction.
I still am grateful to past me for coming up with this and fleshing it out pretty well despite not knowing what this project had in store. Thank you past me!
Unfortunately, due to school competition, I am not able to start filming this week for my project. So, I decided that it would be best to stay as productive as possible and clearly define my shooting schedule. I'll be specifying what scenes need to be done by when and when would be most ideal to shoot them. Spring break will also be interrupting a lot of the time that I would otherwise have for filming, meaning I have to plan accordingly to be able to get all my filming done in the little time I have. My way of tackling this is that the more prepared I am, the faster I can shoot my scenes and have everything go smoother.
Primary filming will be done on Saturday, Sunday being used as a catch all, of next week. The rest of the week beforehand will be used to get everything in order, materials, set décor, setup, etc. This is how I'm splitting it:
Saturday: (early morning) photograph scene in the hallway. Washed out bright, but soft, lighting through curtains.
(late at night) credits scene of different flickering cuts, "flashback" scene of Arlo looking at old footage - film reaction.
Sunday: any corrections that need to be done + additional footage needed
Here are my actual filming ideas for my opening:
While the credits are being presented, there will be sporadic cuts of Arlo all over their room doing different things. Pacing, rocking, laying on their floor, mindlessly staring at the computer/phone, etc. The images are supposed to convey the image of stress, anxiety, and depression.
I'm thinking of keeping my opening silent, no dialogue, it's still pretty flexible and I can add dialogue if need be. However, I think when it comes to mental illness, actions speak louder than words, and I will portray Arlo's inner turmoil through their behavior. To balance the lack of dialogue, I want to focus and work hard on the sound design of my opening and try some really cool techniques.
The house is very bleak and empty. Some scenes will be in the dark (night), while other will have a very washed out, dim, lighting scheme. A black drape over an orange wall, with the orange peaking out. Red and blue books scattered, Arlo might have a red sweater on,
Lighting/filming inspo:
Here are the ideas I have so far for the plot/story of my film:
My story is going to be about Arlo finally expressing how they've felt for so long and their road to recovery, so the opening serves to set up Arlo's mental state. Their is going to be a lot of inner conflict (character v. self) as well as conflict between Arlo and their family (character v. character).
The movie starts with Arlo finding a video of when they were younger and a photo that was taken that same day. As mentioned before, Arlo's cheery younger self fills them with disdain, but they don't really understand why, and these conflicting feelings stress them out. In a fit of rage and confusion as Arlo seems to be having a panic attack, they throw the picture frame, breaking it.
After the frame breaks, Arlo falls to the ground, picking up a broken piece. The piece appears sharp enough to cut through skin, I think you can see where I'm going here. I will not be showing the act of Arlo hurting themselves, but it will be heavily implied. I know self-harm is a hard and kind of taboo topic that can be very triggering, but I also believe it needs to be talked about more.
Arlo is someone who is severely depressed and unmotivated in life. They look back at memories of when they were young and hate how happy they were as a child. They grow angrier and more frustrated as they struggle to fins out what went wrong. Why did they turn out this way? What happened that turned such a happy child into a miserable teenager?
Arlo is home alone a lot and their parents don't ever pay much attention to them. This resulted in Arlo having to suffer alone through all of their issues, which only caused their mental health to deteriorate even more. Their state of mind becomes frantic at times. They experience intense mood swings, they can be stressed running around one minute and laying on the floor motionless the next. Arlo never fully learned how to deal with their emotions, so they cope in negative ways and are easily swayed towards self harm and other self destructive behaviors.
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| I love Undertale (frisk is a big inspiration for my character). They are a good example of a non-binary character. |
